A Bit About the "Butt"

Have you ever noticed how really attractive litter can be? Cigarette butts are among the most attractive forms of litter. The butts are most widely used in "litter art" simply because, with the exception of the vagrant, the professional hobo, or the plain old street bum, the average smoker will discard his butt as useless other than for "litter art" purposes. A wide variety of "litter butt art" styles and techniques abound and are used by different smokers who are fondly known as "litter butt artists". Their motto is "every littered butt counts".

The "butt flicker", one of the most common examples of "litter butt artists", is characteristic of the current period in "litter butt art". The wide public acceptance of this art form is evident from the enormous display of little butts on the streets, sidewalks, and in the gutters of our communities. The "butt flicker" is usually neatly dressed and will never decorate his own territory with his style of "litter butt art", but rather enjoys sharing the art form with his community at large. That way, "litter butt art" is there for all to observe and enjoy. The "butt flicker" takes his butt out of his mouth holding it delicately with the thumb and middle finger. Then, with a sudden flick of the middle finger, the butt is shot out onto the street from a doorway or from the open window of his moving motor vehicle. The butt lands on the sidewalk or street with a tiny crescendo of ash and sparks. Occasionally a foolish, and obviously unsuspecting, pedestrian will suffer from the slings and arrows of the zealous and careless "litter butt artist", the "butt flicker", and receive the unpleasant zonking of a "butt" gone astray. There are, from time to time, "butt flicker artists" who who have provided us with artistic tragedies. These ambitious and overanxious "butt flicking artists" flicketh their butts in the dry forests or at unsuspecting oil and gasoline trucks. No matter, the charring of thousands of acres of trees or the loss of a few lives is a minor price to pay for such a self-indulgent and widely accepted art form.

Another kind of butt artist, known as the "butt crusher" is less commonly recognized but is noted for his strong style. The "butt crusher" drops his butt where he stands and simply and gently, using the sole of his shoe, mutilates the smoldering butt with an unrelenting and crushing dignity which displays a marvelous concern for the avoidance of marring the surface upon which his magnificent butt has landed.

There is the "sneaky butt artist" who has the urgent need to drop his butt at the first available moment and then continues quickly walking so that no one will recognize his talent and steal his idea until the public, thoroughly enamored with the incredible "butt volume", gives the deserved recognition to his style.

The last "litter butt artist" in our discussion is unquestionably last, but certainly not least. He displays the most dramatic style of all. His style is classic and unforgettable. He is the one "litter butt artist" who demonstrates his art form but one time only, and therein lies the derivation of his title, for he is known as the "deadbutt". He is that unforgettable character from the world of smoking who forgets to remove the smouldering "butt" from his mouth because he has fallen asleep. He is often remembered but is rarely recognizable, having inadvertently chosen self-cremation.

There are many other types of "litter butt artists". We have provided a brief survey of this well established and widely accepted and practiced art form. There are, in fact, enough varied types and styles of "litter butt art" to fill a full-length book. We have tried not to slight any members of the "litter butt art" world. If we have, we apologize. There are enough littered butts everywhere to remind those among us who have not taken to this fine art form that it is a part of cultural heritage that has touched us all, a part of history that we had best not forget.

"Butts" are undoubtedly a long accepted and welcome part of the American street scene. Butts have too long been ignored. As one of the great contributions to our artistic culture, "litter butt art" should be savored and exploited to its fullest potential. We could have butt contests like "How many butts on your block?" or "Guess whose butt that is?". Maybe we could even have "deposit butts" as opposed to "no deposit butts". Then, THE NATIONAL ASSOCIATION OF BUTT MANUFACTURERS could come out in favor of a "total butt control law". No "butts" about it, "butts" are here to stay.